I was talking with a guy friend of mine today who is single and like me, shares a love of mountain living. He owns a house in Glen Haven, a small town near Estes Park. My friend was lamenting how difficult dating was, and sighed, “I just need a good mountain woman.” He shared with me how had met a nice woman who lived down on the plains near Loveland. After a few dates, he invited her up to his house in Glen Haven. She arrived, rather exasperated, stating emphatically, “I will never come up here again!” Apparently, she was not a fan of driving windy, mountain roads to small mountain villages. And yet another potential love match was lost.
I chuckled, but also sympathized with my friend. As much as living in the mountains seems very romantic, especially when seen on TV or in a movie, it’s not necessarily so. Despite the vision of love blossoming as a couple snuggles together in front of the fireplace in a quaint log cabin, there aren’t a lot of couples I know that find eternal love over the long haul living in the mountains. Mainly, because it’s rare that both are equally enamored with the uniqueness of mountain culture.
As we have gotten to know our neighbors and chatted over dinners or barbecues, a strong theme has become evident among the couples we know. Usually one of them is passionate about living in the mountains, and the other is a somewhat reluctant partner who feels they have greatly compromised to agree to this lifestyle. Our friends, Barbara and Dan, are perfect examples. Dan loves living in the mountains, and could not be happier chopping wood, cutting trees with his chainsaw, and walking his dogs out in the woods. Barbara is a transplanted city person, and longs for a life in Boulder. She tries to drive down to Boulder every day to connect with friends, hang out at coffee houses, or go shopping. Nothing would make her happier than to move to the city somewhere down on the plains.
Our neighbors across the street moved after only two years. In their case, it was the man, Ryan, who initiated the move to the city, saying it was simply too quiet and too isolated up here. Others feel the strain of constant wildfire danger in summer, while some lament the 150 inches of snow they have to shovel or snow blow during the winter. It seems sooner or later, the partner who has pushed for a life in the mountains gives up and gives in to their “city mouse” spouse and yet another house goes on the market. One couple we know who seems to be in sync, Anne and Jim, have been here for more than 30 years, and claim the average for most folks is around 3 years or so.
While it may seem strange, it is in fact the exception, not the rule, that a couple is on the same page in the universal desire to live the mountain lifestyle, embracing both the positives and meeting the challenges with cheer and commitment. I feel lucky to have a partner who shares my love of the mountains as I do, and feels content every evening to return home to our mountain refuge. And I hope for my friend, Graham, that he too is able to find his mountain woman some day that can appreciate the peace and solace of a quiet cabin in the woods.
